Guides for separation

Nobody gets taught how to do this. These are the things we wish someone had told us.

Tips people want to pass on

Open your own bank account before you tell anyone you're leaving.Mara, Inner West

Write down what happened while it's fresh. The dates matter more than you think.Daniel, Northern Beaches

Keep your messages, even the painful ones. Sorting them later is easier than finding them.Priya, Parramatta

Be kinder to yourself than feels reasonable. Slow down where you can.Nick, Northern Beaches

Don't underestimate what fighting over a financial settlement costs you, in money and in years of your life. I'd have been better off settling early, even paying more than felt fair, just to move on. It cost me less in the end, and saved me years of stress.Jane, Brisbane

Separate your finances as soon as you can. Anything that keeps you tangled together, shared accounts, joint bills, becomes a source of endless friction, and it only gets harder to unpick the longer you leave it.Mark, Parramatta

Everything here is free to read.

The guides

First week

A separation goes the way you steer it

Almost nobody has done this before. The instinct is to hand it to the experts and wait for the system to put things right. But a separation is something you take charge of, or something that takes charge of you, in your money, your time, and how you come out the other side.

5 min read

Family lawyers bill by the hour, whether that hour is spent advising you or organising you.

Arriving prepared means your money buys advice, not admin.

One good meeting
Costs

There's no calculator

Everybody wants a number, and it is the one thing no one can honestly give. Here is why family law gives you a range instead, and how to plan around it rather than chase a figure that does not exist.

4 min read
Costs

Why legal bills spiral

Almost no one decides to run up an enormous legal bill, yet it happens all the time. These are the forces that quietly push a separation far past what it ever needed, and how to step away before the money is gone.

5 min read
Costs

One good meeting

Family lawyers bill in six-minute units, so ten scattered calls can cost far more than one prepared meeting. Here is how the billing clock actually works, and how to make your money buy advice instead of admin.

4 min read
Costs

What a separation actually costs

Two bills can be identical and still mean opposite things. This is how to tell the costs your situation genuinely needs from the extra that quietly gathers on top, and why only one of them is ever really in your hands.

5 min read
Kids

The dates that slip through every parenting plan

The weekly routine is the easy part. It's the birthdays, term dates, and appointments outside it that cause the friction later.

4 min read
Lawyers

Is calling a lawyer escalation?

Picking up the phone can feel like firing the first shot. It isn't. A good lawyer helps you see what's normal and what's worth pursuing, so you can decide calmly.

3 min read
First week

A chronology, the story of your relationship

It sounds like admin. It is really how you give a lawyer or mediator facts to advise on, instead of leaving them to fall back on what usually happens to everyone else.

4 min read
Kids

Should you be the first call before a babysitter?

The right of first refusal gives you first option to mind the children before a babysitter is called. Lovely in theory, but it carries a sting in the tail.

2 min read
AI & privacy

How PartWise uses AI, and why your information is safe

A plain-language look at what AI does inside PartWise, and exactly where your information goes when it does.

3 min read
Money

If money is disappearing, move early

If you suspect the other person is spending down or hiding money, the 2025 law changes make waiting riskier than it used to be. Courts can no longer restore money that is already gone, so the protection now lies in acting early. If the concern is real, that is a conversation to have with a family law adviser this week, not next quarter.

3 min read
Money

Disclosure is now the law, not just a rule

Since 10 June 2025, the duty to lay out your full financial position is written into the Family Law Act itself, and it is ongoing rather than a one-off. Holding back or hiding can cost you, both in a costs order and in how the property is divided. The cheapest way to meet it is to keep one honest, organised picture from the start.

3 min read
Money

Spent money stays spent: the end of add-backs

A 2025 court decision changed how property settlements work. The courts now share out only what still exists when your matter is decided, so money one side has already spent often cannot be counted back in. Keeping a clear record of what was sold or spent, and why, now matters more than it used to.

3 min read
MoneySmart: Divorce and separation financial checklistThe Australian Government's free step-by-step financial guidemoneysmart.gov.au →
Kids

Why some parents do changeover at the school gate

Hand the children over at school, not the front door, and you never have to meet. For a lot of parents, that one change takes the heat out of the week.

2 min read

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